haven't really written in my journal in a while

so yeah when i got back from greece this summer there was a lot that i wanted to tell everyone but i didn't have the time to write it all and then i went to college and well hadn't really thought about my live journal because I didn't feel like too many people really read it...and now a week before finals i needed a break from my paper and i needed someone to talk to and my lj is a pretty good listener.

I'm deciding whether or not i should transfer schools for next semester or next year. my mom wants me to go to sacred heart but i really want to go to england and i have to figure out if it's because of one person or if it's really what i want to do. i haven't figured out what's even going on between us anymore but i'll figure it out in january i guess and who knows if it's too late by then. Sacred Heart is definitely not an option because after crying my eyes out i decided that i need to make myself happy and not prove anything to anyone. i'm sick of people asking me what i want and them not agreeing with what i want and then telling me what i should do. I mean HELLO! why would you ask me what i want if you already know the answer you want to hear.

i guess it's time to break away from what my parents want, and what everyone else wants from me and become my own person. just a couple of weeks ago i said that i didn't like being an adult but in just a few weeks i've fixed a lot of my problems and now i know i can hanlde it and i just have to make sure i make some good decisions, but you only live once so why not live through your heart and not your head? if you crash and burn at least you tried and did what you wanted to and if it didn't work then you can always start over but you can't look back and change the past. I know what i want but i have to figure out how to do it and how to prove to everyone that it's good for me and it will make me happy and that even tho it might not be the best option for them it's the best one for me.

now that all that randomness is out there hopefully it will make sense to me if i ever read my own journal. for everyone else....thanks for listening and it's back to my essay...i'm writing about the rain which is another good reason that i should go to england :)